Valentine's Day and the feelings behind it

Yesterday was Valentines Day, we decided not to get each other gifts since we are saving for a wedding. I did get her some flowers, a card and some chocolate covered strawberries (freshly made) she got me a card, a pair of panties (women's panties in case you were wondering) and a shirt (guys shirt in case you were wondering). In addition to the flowers, card and strawberries I wrote her something. It was a message about how far she has come since we met, how far she has gained in her confidence, her career and just in her level of happiness. I also wrote about how even though we are 4 years older than when we met how I think she is even more beautiful than the day we met and I meant every word of it.

It got me thinking about our past, and to a particular day in the development of our FLR. It was the day that changed everything in the way we are now.

It was the early days of our FLR, back then I was new and my macho exterior would get in the way of letting my true self out. I was wanting to cross dress, at the time it was something that was new to me, not new to my fantasies but new to reality. However no matter how bad I wanted to do it, I wanted her to make me do it, like "It wasn't my choice to do this." Same goes for my submission, I felt like when she told me to do something that somehow I should act like I was obeying her against my will, that she was forcing me to be obedient.

One night she gave me a chore to do and I acted like I was going to do it but really didn't want to. She stopped me and said, "You know what, forget it." When I asked why she said, that if we were going to continue this it had to be what we both wanted. That if I was going to obey her then it would be because I wanted to obey her. She said she didn't want to force me to be in an FLR. It was then that we had a heart to heart talk and I explained that in some ways my fantasies over the years all involved me being forced to wear women's clothes, forced to obey a woman. Like I was protecting this secret I had inside of me, "It's not me, she is making me do this." Of course it was all a defense mechanism but when we had our heart to heart she said to me that, "There is nothing wrong with what you want to be, there is no harm in being the way you feel and how you like to dress and I am ok with this."

That night changed my whole life. We decided together that, I wanted to obey her and gave her control....willingly, but that from that point on she had control and I lost the ability to take it back.

She also said I could dress in her clothes but I had to do it because I wanted to AND that there needed to be parameters. She said that I liked to serve her when cross dressed so she would use that to her advantage, if I wanted to dress up, that's fine but while you are dressed you need to be cleaning my house. She also knew that I cleaned better being cross dressed, I focused more on my cleaning and didn't take short cuts when dressed. Who knows why but that didn't matter, just go with it she said.

That night changed a lot of things for me. I now am happy when she decides while sitting on the couch that I won't be done working for a while yet, just "because she said so" I know the command must be obeyed but I also know I want to obey and this is where I am happiest.

So when you think of what you love about your Valentine I can't make a long enough list about the things I love about mine.